March 09, 2014
Don't get me wrong, I love men too! My dad, my husband, my brother in laws, my cousins and my male friends are all top shelf specimens and I feel really fortunate to have them in my life.
I 'get' men and was always a bit of a tomboy growing up. I liked to surf, get up to mischief and wasn't much into hair and make-up etc. so I slotted in quite nicely with the male persuasion and found them easier to relate to.
I think I also garnered quite a bit of confidence being around guys a lot. They didn't question their worth and if they felt unsure about something, they certainly didn't let on. They just tried anything. Acted first and thought later so there was no second guessing themselves. That fearlessness rubbed off on me and I always did what I wanted and spoke my mind just like my guy friends which was not always met with the same acceptance. As the years have rolled on, I have lost a lot of that and I don't believe it's just because I'm older and wiser. I think, as most of us do, I lost bits of myself along the way with each new experience and each new decision that had to be made.
So back to the women in my life. They are family and they are friends, but it's only since about my mid 20's that I realised that not only are the women in my life beyond precious but they are people I. Can. Just. Not. Do. Without.
They amaze me, inspire me, encourage me, love me, hold me, listen to me, cherish me, make me laugh, make me cry and make me glad that I am one of them.
You see, I think women are the most amazing creatures on earth.
We grow humans inside of us.
We make the food to feed these mini humans.
We can cry at the drop of a hat even if it's for a picture, a person we will never know, a line in a song, an old photograph or the injustice on the news.
We can hold a child on one hip while talking on the phone to our mum and placing an order on the internet all at the same time.
We FEEL things. Whether we get a woo woo feeling of something not quite right with our sister or friend, so we call them and lo and behold, they needed to talk or we run to the room of our child as we just felt them get cold and pull a blanket up on them as they sleep.
We can laugh and laugh to the point of hysteria at the smallest things. Even wet our pants but keep on laughing as we will not let go of the joy we are currently feeling (plus most of us are manically tired) 😉
We can think ahead and organise our life and the lives of those around us for the next decade.
We know the preferred brand of ANYTHING to buy the people we live with as well as their preferred food/clothing/toy/tv show/music/book/drink/mug/hat/shoes/movie/song/holiday destination......
So who cares if we don't know the exact direction our car is in the Westfield shopping centre car park or if looking at a map the right way round is classed as an achievement...we are too busy thinking about the next 3 meals we have to cook, what to send our aunt for her birthday and possibly how to achieve world peace.
Who cares if we analyse things to the point of madness only to second guess ourselves and start all over again....we are a very thorough bunch!
Who cares if we are never quite happy with our appearance, our weight, our career, our achievements...surely that means we just aspire to greatness in every avenue of life? 😉
Who cares if we are unstable, hormone imbalanced, swinging temperamental crazies? If our reproductive hormones weren't constantly fluctuating wouldn't that mean we couldn't grow us a human if we wanted to? Or search our souls and make some major changes once a month just to feel right again?
Ok...but now for the bone to pick with the female race....
So we are these indisputably amazing beings with so much to offer everyone around us and we find it quite hard to like or even love ourselves.
We also judge ourselves and others too harshly.
These are the biggest flaws I can see in women. I deal with women all day, every day in my business and the most common thread of concern is a lack of confidence in themselves and their choices and also how they talk about themselves.
Please don't think I'm pointing a finger only at you reading this because that big ol' finger is pointed squarely at myself also.
I am starting to like myself more and more and my confidence has always been high whether that's just me or due to the people I hung around as I was growing up but... present one of my decisions to me on a silver platter and I will undoubtedly hear my own voice in my head saying 'Why Did You Do That?'
I think maybe that a lot of us women are control freaks...and so when something happens that is outside of our control (and let's face it, that's pretty much EVERYTHING) we react and then we.....judge.
I know I need to relax more and let go more and I bet a lot of people reading this feel the same.
So to all the women reading this I would like to point out that you are the most amazing, incredible, fabulous, multi-tasking, caring, loving, all seeing being but you have to learn to treat yourself with the love and respect you deserve as so many women before you have fought to get you here.
Nothing has been as easy for a woman as it has been for a man and that is just birth lottery but I believe that is what makes us so great. We strive, we conquer our own boundaries, we love, we break and we have most definitely come out on top as far as lottery stakes go.
If you doubt your decisions or yourself, please work on that and be confident in the fact that no matter where you are placed in your family whether it's daughter, mother, aunt, friend, sister, I bet you are the glue holding the family or friendship circle together.
That in itself is irreplaceable and if you were looking at you from where I am, you would love everything about you.
The best way to learn to love yourself more, is spend some time with yourself with loving thoughts. I think it's hard to just sit down and look at ourselves and say I love you to the mirror but having time set aside morning and night and putting some of that love that is going into everyone else back into you is a very good idea.
There are lots of ways to give back to yourself but you may not be able to get a massage/pedicure/girls weekend/yoga class in on a daily basis! That's why you need to create a routine at home so that love is channeled towards you, by you, daily. Do this in the ways you know fill your cup and fit them in every day and then things like a massage/pedicure/girls night/yoga class will just be a lovely extra top-up.
Give yourself more time to fall in love with yourself. After all, you will be by your own side for the rest of your life so nurturing that relationship is pretty important!
If you are after any ideas on giving back to yourself and creating a love filled, nurturing routine for yourself at home, have a look at the Gift Ideas and Package Deals section in my shop containing products that I have put together for women who need to look after themselves a bit more.
Yours in Health,
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